
Did you hear about the Scottish drag queen? He wore pants. ~Lynn Lavner

If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders. ~Abigail Van Buren

A real friend is someone who would feel loss if you jumped on a train, or in front of one. ~Author Unknown

The value of identity of course is that so often with it comes purpose. ~Richard Grant

Hope is the only bee that makes honey without flowers. ~Robert Ingersoll Hope is the only universal liar who never loses his reputation for veracity. ~Robert G. Ingersoll

No one should have to dance backward all of their lives. ~Jill Ruckelshaus

Oft expectation fails, and most oft where most it promises; and oft it hits where hope is coldest; and despair most sits. ~William Shakespeare

Work to ride and ride to work. ~Author Unknown

Diagnosis is not the end, but the beginning of practice. ~Martin H. Fischer

As long as we know in our hearts what Christmas ought to be, Christmas is. ~Eric Sevareid
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Difficult things take a long time, impossible things a little longer. ~Andre A. Jackson

You know you live in Phoenix when you've experienced condensation on your butt cheeks from the hot water evaporating in the toilet bowl. ~Author Unknown

Earth with heaven above rejoices... ~Charles Kingsley

Industry executives and analysts often mistakenly talk about strategy as if it were some kind of chess match. But in chess, you have just two opponents, each with identical resources, and with luck playing a minimal role. The real world is much more like a poker game, with multiple players trying to make the best of whatever hand fortune has dealt them. In our industry, Bill Gates owns the table until someone proves otherwise. ~David Moschella

He does not believe who does not live according to his belief. ~Thomas Fuller

The view that a peptic ulcer may be the hole in a man's stomach through which he crawls to escape from his wife has fairly wide acceptance. ~John Allan Dalrymple Anderson

When you reach for the stars, you may not quite get one, but you won't come up with a handful of mud either. ~Leo Burnett

Neurotics dream of a good life, or a great suicide note. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

The contemplative life is often miserable. One must act more, think less, and not watch oneself live. ~Nicolas Chamfort
It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. ~Proverbs 21:9
Unemployment diminishes people. Leisure enlarges them. ~Mason Cooley
Happiness is the resultant of the relative strengths of positive and negative feelings rather than an absolute amount of one or the other. ~Norman Bradburn
Ford's success has startled the country, almost the world, financially, industrially, mechanically. It exhibits in higher degree than most persons would have thought possible the seemingly contradictory requirements of true efficiency, which are: constant increase of quality, great increase of pay to the workers, repeated reduction in cost to the consumer. And with these appears, as at once cause and effect, an absolutely incredible enlargement of output reaching something like one hundredfold in less than ten years, and an enormous profit to the manufacturer. ~Charles Buxton Going
If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer. ~Clement Freud, The Observer, 27 December 1964
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